Mimi & Sophie Gilmour on Hospitality, Hosting, and Connection

Sophie - We’ve both followed a squiggly road to land in a remarkably similar place - Mimi via Fine Arts Photography at Elam and me via Law and Politics at Otago University. Hospitality is in our blood though so it’s not completely surprising that we both own and operate hospitality businesses. In addition to co-owning Fatimas I have a hospitality consultancy business (Delicious Business) , a coworking and events space (The Village) and sit on several food charity boards (Everybody Eats, DineAid, The Bread Collective) so everything I do is food related! My school stories were apparently all about what everyone ate, so there were early signs!

Mimi - Like Sophie, my path has been a little unconventional. I studied Fine Arts Photography at Elam, which at the time felt like a creative pursuit rather than a career path, but it ended up shaping how I see the world. Photography teaches you to observe people, light, mood and detail, and those instincts translate surprisingly well into hospitality.

I eventually co-founded Burger Burger about ten years ago and have spent the last decade building restaurants and hospitality brands. What I love about this industry is that it sits at the intersection of creativity, business and human connection. You’re creating spaces where people celebrate birthdays, fall in love, repair friendships or simply unwind at the end of a long day.

Sophie and I came at hospitality from very different angles, but we both landed in the same place because we genuinely love feeding people and creating environments where people feel welcome.

Sophie - I like to set the house up by lighting candles and dimming lights, then allow for a small amount of chaos and mess which I think puts people at ease and creates a bit of fun - sometimes I’ll have guests rolling spring rolls or having drinks by the BBQ while I finish off the meal. A strong cocktail on arrival is a great way to get the conversation flowing and I always delegate the music to the guest with the best taste to ensure it’s not forgotten. I love to invite a mix of people that know one another and a few that don’t - its fun to be a part of people making new friends!

Mimi - I completely agree with Sophie that hosting is more about how people feel than what you serve.

For me the most important thing is creating atmosphere. Lighting candles, putting on great music, opening a good bottle of wine and making sure people feel relaxed the moment they arrive.

I also think generosity is key. Big platters in the middle of the table, food that’s meant to be shared, and the freedom for people to help themselves. It removes formality and makes the evening feel more natural.

The other thing I love is Sophie’s point about mixing people. Some of the most memorable nights happen when people meet someone new and end up talking for hours. For my 40th we had a dinner party for 50. It was all my favourite people, many who didn’t know each other, multi generational & I made them move tables each course so they all got to learn why they were all so important to me & it was one of the best nights of my life! 

Sophie - I think working in front of house hospitality (and particularly fine dining like I did for a decade alongside school, university and practising law) gives you an innate ability to read people and anticipate how they’re feeling and what they might need. I think hosting people is about making them feel special, not about wowing them with your culinary prowess so simple food done well is always a winner and paying attention to each guest goes a long way. Sitting around a table has been a cornerstone of my daily life since we were young - it’s the best place to check in with your loved ones. 

Mimi - Food and gathering were always central in our family growing up. Our door was usually open and there were often people around. Both our parents worked, so it was not always a traditional dinner together every night, but Sophie and I did grow up sitting around the table together.

Mama always lit a candle and made it feel like a moment. She taught us that sitting down at the table was a ritual, a time to pause and share with the people you love.

At home it looks a little different for us now because of Olympia’s needs, but all of my children love being involved in the kitchen and sitting around the table. Whenever we can, we bring friends and family in too, adults and children all mixed together. It is honestly my happiest place, around a table full of people.

There is also a quote from a very well-known chef that has always stayed with me: when we sit together at a table, we are all created equal. I think that is incredibly true. The table is a grounding and levelling place where beautiful conversations can happen, and I believe we should protect it.

Sophie - I’m not sure I’ve mastered this! Ensuring you don’t keep putting creative work off in favour of the mundane essentials is where I’ve landed - even if it’s a stretch on time. I’m resolved to the fact that I’ll never have a completely clear space in my schedule to indulge in creative projects alone, so I’m forcing the balance and I grab inspiration where I can get it whether it’s instagram, travel or eating out.

Mimi - I think creativity comes from staying curious. I am lucky because my mind has always been a curious place and it never rests! 

Running businesses and a family means there are always operational demands pulling at your attention, so I try to consciously protect time to notice things, travel, eat in interesting places, look at design, read, listen to people’s stories.

Some of my best ideas have come from completely unexpected places, a small café in another city, a beautiful menu design, a conversation with someone outside the industry, a book or even something my children has said. Their perspective on the world is so untouched and sometimes it reminds you that the world doesn’t need to be that complicated. 

I’ve also learned that creativity isn’t something you wait for. You have to make space for it, even when life is busy. If it’s something you need to be you - you have to make the time. I’m not going to lie but some of my best ideas come to me after a delicious glass of wine or two!

Sophie - I’ve returned to yoga this year at Sala and try to get to the gym every day during the week - I’ve noticed that it’s becoming less about how I look and more about how I feel and it’s cool to see how a mix of classes contribute to me feeling fit, strong and mobile. I love a Thai massage as well, there’s a great spot in the Birkenhead shops that I find really restorative.

Mimi - Time with my children is probably the most grounding thing for me. Outside of that, I try to stay connected with the people who matter most in my life. Sometimes that means cooking for friends and family, sometimes it is playing tennis, and I have recently taken up golf.

If I am feeling a little indulgent I love a good massage, although I tend to lean towards the therapeutic kind rather than purely relaxing ones.

I have also realised over the years that I probably need more rest than I did when I was younger. I am quite an extroverted introvert, so sometimes the most restorative thing for me is simply quiet time alone.

And then there are the small rituals that somehow make life feel a little more in control. Getting my eyebrows done at Birkenhead Mall or taking the car through Wash World are oddly satisfying resets for me. Simple, slightly ridiculous, but very effective.

Sophie - I appreciate that this theme is alluding to equality not always being fair and I really believe that. Women have totally different physiology to men, and often a completely different relationship with their work and/or home lives so we’re often contending with unique challenges to men (and we have unique superpowers too!). I support hospitality businesses building in maternity policies that mean female staff don’t leave the jobs they love and I make an effort to review pay rates on an annual basis rather than by responding to requests. The more we speak to these differences the more we can all adapt to them in pursuit of equity and also, celebrate, support and uplift each other in ways that take these differences into account.

Mimi - I really appreciate that the theme recognises that equality is not always the same as fairness. Women often have different physiological realities and, in many cases, a different relationship to work and home life, particularly during seasons like pregnancy, early motherhood or caring for family members.

In hospitality, which can be a demanding industry, that can create real challenges if workplaces are not designed with those realities in mind. At the same time, women bring incredible strengths to leadership, empathy, resilience and the ability to build strong communities.

In our businesses one of the things we try to prioritise is flexibility. Hospitality has traditionally been quite rigid, but wherever we can we try to create flexibility for women and for fathers as well, so people can support their families while continuing to grow in their careers.

I have probably always been a little biased in being an advocate for lifting women up. For me that shows up through leadership, creating opportunities, supporting women to step forward and making sure their contributions are recognised. The more we support one another and build workplaces that acknowledge real life, the closer we get to genuine equity.

Sophie - My parents’ signature perfumes floating through the house signified they were going out when I was small - my sister and I used to love watching them get dressed up! Grey Flannel (my father) and Caleche (my mother).

Mimi - The smell of butter and garlic always reminds me of home and family. It is such a simple smell but it instantly brings a sense of comfort.

Our father passed away last year and, like Sophie, I recently smelt the cologne he wore for most of his life. The moment I recognised it, it brought back a flood of memories and reminded me deeply of everything he meant to me.

Sophie - I’ve recently hired a rowing machine at home and I start my day with a quick 3km to give me an energy boost for the day!

Mimi - Cuddles with my babies, and coffee. I do not think anyone is ever going to convince me that matcha is better.

Sophie - You can’t beat Spaghetti alle Vongole by the beach!

Mimi - Vongole at MAMA.

Sophie - Homing by Matt Gibberd - it explores the importance of home in shaping who we are

Mimi - Lessons on Living by Nigel Latta explores how to live a calmer, more meaningful life by focusing on what truly matters, strong relationships, perspective, and letting go of things we cannot control.

Sophie - Tui & Kahili

Mimi - Blossom & Guilt (followed closely by Tui & Kahili)